Drop Judgment to Relieve Anxiety

[**Note: I created an audio of the post in case you’d like to listen to it rather than read it, or follow along – if you like this option, let me know in the comments below…thanks! Listening time = 3:07]



When we  judge something, whether we’re judging a person, a situation, a group of people, an event or outcome, we are attaching thoughts to those people or circumstances. And we believe these thoughts because that’s how we’ve been conditioned.

We’ve grown up hearing judgments made from our family members, friends, teachers and the media. Actually we get quite bombarded by judgments on a daily basis – we hear them, and if we’re not aware of how these thoughts affect us, we suffer.

When we judge, we tend to compare. Seconds after meeting someone, we decide if we like that person or not, whether they are pretty or not and whether we want to continue hanging out with them or not. We judge whether they are like us or not.

If someone you just met is wearing designer clothes and you couldn’t care less about designer clothes, then you probably already made a judgment about whether you want to hang out with that person or not. You probably also made a judgment about how much money that person has and if you don’t have a lot of money, you feel like you won’t fit in.

It’s just a thing the mind does.

And when we get caught up in these judgments, thinking we’re not good enough or cool enough or pretty enough, we suffer.

So the key thing here is to become aware of our thoughts, which is what judgments are – they are just thoughts. And as soon as we are aware of them and realize we don’t have to believe them, we are set free. We can notice what we just did, “ahhhh, there goes the mind again, making negative judgments”, and realize that those judgments don’t mean a thing.

Of course our ego doesn’t want us to know that. The ego loves judgment and conflict. And it will try very hard to make you unaware of your thoughts……..it will just add more judgment (thoughts) on top of the others and try to fool you. But you won’t be fooled anymore.

You will know that you are so much more than any single thought.

You can exist without thought………….the ego cannot.

So if you want to start becoming aware of when you judge, set an intention to do just that.

Then, when you become aware of a judgment, ask yourself,

“What would it look like if I gently poured compassion all over that judgment?

Notice what happens when you do that. Then keep doing it. Make this a practice if you want to release judgment.

It can be done.

And you can do it!

inhale ~ enjoy ~ exhale,


13 Responses to Drop Judgment to Relieve Anxiety

  1. You’re welcome Donna…….having the awareness that you dislike being judgmental and knowing it has affected the relationship with your daughter is the first step needed in order to make a shift……..

  2. Gina thank you for this I hate being so jusdge mental of everyone and everything and its now driven a wedge between my daughter and I …

  3. Love it Gina, and enjoy the way you put it! thanks for the reminder
    The moment we drop our judgement, we gain our power back…

    all my love

  4. @Sue, I love that piece you shared-totally oozes compassion :). Yes the ego loves being attached to things…that little bugger…..thx for sharing!

    @Jodi, so glad you liked the compassion pouring :).

  5. Gina, the compassion piece is so important! I love how James Baraz talks about this in his Awakening Joy book and course.

    I’m paraphrasing, but I think I have it close:

    When you become aware of yourself in self-judgement, gently cup your cheek with your hand, like your loving grandmother or another loving compassionate person would, and say to yourself, “Oh, darling, that’s another judging thought.”

    When I can do that for myself, the power of the thought lessens, and the hold on me just evaporates.

    Bringing this kind of loving awareness is a perfect counter to the ego’s attachment to judgement.

    Love and light,

  6. yes, Lesley…awareness is SO key……many people walk around like zombie’s oblivious to all their negative thoughts……like I did for so many years…..no more and that’s why I’m so passionate about awareness practice :).
    thx for stopping by and sharing!

  7. Awareness, awareness, awareness! Interesting idea on the audio, too. What I find interesting is how some cling to judgements (myself included at times!). That’s when I know it’s time to ask “what’s the payoff?”

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